Dear Tuk-Tuk Driver,
I know writing this will do nothing to change your behavior, but I will waste my time anyway. Stop harrassing me. I have an extremely high tolerance for behavior which other people, especially women, absolutely hate. But nowhere, nowhere on earth have I felt harrassed to the extent I did during my ten weeks in Southeast Asia.
I walk down the street, slowly on my way to lunch. Quickly on my way to the train station. Looking shabby and frowning. Well dressed and smiling. It doesn’t matter. Your eyes spot me from an incredible distance. Immediately you jump off of the seat of the rickshaw you use to transport people around town, raise your hands high in the air and begin waving them wildly in a criss-cross motion as you move quickly towards me. Tuk-tuk? Tuk-tuk? You walk or ride beside me for minutes, hoping I will want a ride. I don’t.
In the early days I smiled and said a polite no to your aggressive pleas as you continued to follow me along the street. In the final days, I saw other people also smilingly saying no and realized they must be very new to this. Shortly I became so turned off by your behavior I couldn’t even look at you anymore. My eyes hidden by sunglasses, I walked along as you walked backwards in front of me or rode slowly along beside me, repetitively uttering tuk-tuk? tuk-tuk? As my polite, smiling no‘s didn’t succeed in turning you away, neither does my lack of response. You make what could be a simple walk from point A to point B stressful. Your behavior fills my head with negative thoughts about you and others like you. Stop it.
On the few occasions when I actually did want or need a tuk-tuk ride while in Asia, I really enjoyed our time together. You were much nicer and gentler than you appeared on the street. I will never forget my final tuk-tuk driver, who stalked me on the streets of Hue, Vietnam, then waited for me outside a restaurant in the cold rain. This man of approximately 50 years of age with a beaming smile then pedaled me on a two-hour round trip through wind-driven drizzle to the Thien Mu Pagoda on the Perfume River. When I tried, and failed, to communicate that I wanted to spend some time walking along the river before we returned, he searched for and found an English speaking colleague who translated for me and made it possible for me to walk at my leisure while he pedaled slowly out on the street until I was ready to go back. Thanking him with only money and words didn’t seem adequate, and I regretted not having given him more. A little bit of my heart melted for him and all the other tuk-tuk drivers I’d passed by.
Then, the next day, there were dozens of you again, shouting at me, waving at me, following me. Go away, I wanted to say but didn’t. I know you need money badly, but weeks and weeks of being followed and harrassed has massively turned me off. Asking politely once and then taking no for an answer or, better yet, letting me come to you would really improve your reptuation and possibly even allow you to earn a little extra money. If you’re not interested in entirely altering your business model, though, at least, please, stop the harrassment.
Sincerely,
A Harrassed Traveler
I totally commiserate with you on this one. My biggest gripe about living in Bangkok is the constant harassment from tuk-tuk drivers, taxi drivers, women selling cheap souvenirs, men selling cheap suits etc.
A friend visited me from the US and she commented on my ability to ignore the harassment because she would stop and politely say no to each one while I would just continue walking.
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Sabina Reply:
March 16th, 2011 at 01:56
Hi, Melanie. I guess living in Bangkok would be quite difficult due to the harrassment issue. It’s great that you can ignore it. I pretended to, but of course they still kept coming at me.
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Hahaha, I’ve always thought just the same thing! Stop harrassing tourists & you might make money!
In Bali, I used to make a big show of buying from the ladies at stalls who weren’t shouting at me to “come buy!!! I give you a good price!” and you could see they were kind of working it out- be nicer, make money. At least I hope they were getting the idea. Maybe in 20 years they will change
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Sabina Reply:
March 16th, 2011 at 01:59
For real. I guess they just think the more they come at us, the more money they’ll make, when the opposite is true. I also made a practice, sometimes anyway, of giving my money to the people who weren’t bothering me at all. It’s the right thing to do, I think.
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There really is a fine line between being assertive and being aggressive, isn’ t there? I do have to feel for them, because obviously they’re just trying to make a living, but it really does border on harrassment. I wonder if any travel bloggers have discussed this with tuk-tuk drivers to get their POV? Not saying you should have, just wondering if anyone has.
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Sabina Reply:
March 16th, 2011 at 02:00
Hi Gray, I wonder. It would be hard to talk to them about it, because not many of them seem to understand that much English. You would think after having so many people pass them by for so long, they would get the hint, and perhaps some of them do. But too many don’t.
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Agh, I’d be SO terrible at saying no. :-/ I never know what to say or do. But I love that you still have such a great story about that one driver anyway. You wove it in here perfectly.
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Sabina Reply:
March 16th, 2011 at 02:01
You do too know what do say and do!! And you absolutely have to say no. Otherwise, all of your money will go to the tuk-tuks and you won’t have any left over for food and accommodations
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I can sympathize with you. I find that the more aggressive these people are, the less likely I’d buy from them. When are they going to learn?
jill- Jack and Jill Travel The World recently posted..Backpacking Denali – 7 Memorable Mistakes We Made
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Sabina Reply:
March 16th, 2011 at 02:03
Hi, Jill. I wondered that every day. How can they not have learned by now that their technique sucks?
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I know where you coming from on this. I’ve met my fair share of aggressive Tuk Tuk drivers. For me, the worst were the guys offering rides on their motorbikes in Phnom Penh. I wanted to go somewhere and had to choose from a huge group of them wanting my business. I picked one who was being really friendly instead of another one who was being really aggressive and even blocking my way to the other guy. Eventually I got on the bike, but the aggressive guy stared at me and pointed his finger at me in a sinister way. It was a pretty scary moment for me.
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Sabina Reply:
March 17th, 2011 at 15:41
Oh, yeah, the motorbike drivers are almost as bad. They didn’t follow me as I walked along, though, like the tuk-tuk drivers, which is why I focused this letter on them. Phnom Penh – I stayed in a hotel during my two nights there, where my room was across the street from the hotel’s main building, which is where the kitchen was, with its complimentary coffee and breakfast. After I woke up in the morning my first day, I had to walk across the street for coffee at maybe 6:00 a.m., and was immediately assaulted by half a dozen tuk-tuk drivers waving their arms in front of my face and shouting. It was horrible. The second morning I used an electric carafe to heat water and make instant coffee. I just couldn’t stand to go out there again and have them harrass me in my waking moments.
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Thats just crazy my wife would go nuts and want to stay indoors. I understand why they do what they do but it would bother most people.
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Sabina Reply:
March 17th, 2011 at 15:49
Yep, they are an ever-present force on the streets. It never made me stay indoors, but it was an absolute constant annoyance.
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I have a feeling this would annoy me tremendously. I always hate walking through tourist areas wherever I go as there are always people bugging me to buy something. I know they are trying to make money, but I am incredibly turned off when someone just sees me as a giant $ walking down the street.
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Sabina Reply:
March 23rd, 2011 at 08:40
Hi, Suzy. That is so true – they probably do just see us as big dollars signs.
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Aha, I was harassed by a tuk tuk driver in Singapore too. He used to wait for “customers” right at the entrance of my hotel. He was so annoying and in the end he even refused to be taken a photo. That confirmed my hatred for him
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Sabina Reply:
March 23rd, 2011 at 08:41
Oh, no photo? Actually, these guys didn’t exactly pose for me either. I just ended up getting so annoyed with them, I didn’t feel bad snapping pictures right in their faces.
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I feel your pain! I hate using sarcasm, especially with people who have English as a second language, but sometimes I start saying (usually under my breath), “Really? You have a tuk tuk? How unusual! I’ve never seen one of those before!” as a half a dozen drivers follow me down the street yelling at me.
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Sabina Reply:
March 23rd, 2011 at 08:41
Ha! Yes, tuk-tuks are really very unusual in Asia. It’s a good thing the drivers are constantly bringing them to our attention
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I’m with you. I once did a social experiment in Bangkok and stood completely silent and motionless for over an hour in front of an area where tuk-tuk drivers were hanging out. Despite my lack of response and statue-like appearance, they never stopped harassing me.
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Sabina Reply:
March 23rd, 2011 at 08:46
You really did that, Turner?! That is hilarious! It’s interesting that they never stopped bugging you for the entire hour. I wish someone could have videotaped you. Perhaps you could do it again?…
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Is that in Thailand? I know tuk-tuk is the equivalent of taxi or a cab. But I didn’t experience anything like that in the Philippines. Some people need to know how to stop when you refuse an offer
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Sabina Reply:
March 23rd, 2011 at 08:42
Hi, Jilianne It was all over SE Asia. I’ve never been to the Phillipines. Maybe they act differently there.
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I love this letter! Maybe we all need to learn how to say this in local language (or make it printed in the back of our T-shirt):
No tuk-tuk today. Will not change my mind.
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Sabina Reply:
March 23rd, 2011 at 08:45
That’s a great idea, Dina. I think there would be a large market for those shirts. Maybe you could have a few thousand made up, sell them across SE Asia and make a bundle
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Dina Reply:
March 23rd, 2011 at 15:02
Actually, that’s not a bad idea!
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I know exactly what you mean about this! In South Korea, the level of harrassment isn’t too high as it’s a richer country, but it can still grate sometimes.
Taxi drivers will ALWAYS honk like crazy when they see me, a white person. Because obviously I stumbled out of Incheon Airport and took a wrong turn and ended up in my neighbourhood four hours away. I can’t possibly live in the area and know where I’m going…My Korean friends are always perplexed by the honking, as naturally it doesn’t happen to them.
Shop assistants will also stick like glue as soon as you walk into any store and follow you around, no more than 2 feet away, as you browse clothes or whatever is on sale. I end up just walking out after a while because I feel to pressured, and then the clerks wonder why I didn’t buy anything…
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Sabina Reply:
March 30th, 2011 at 23:59
Hi, Tom – taxi drivers constantly honking at you four hours away from the airport in your own neighborhood is very funny. I think tuk-tuk, motorbike and taxi drivers must be on automatic pilot most of the time – they see a white person, any white person anywhere, and they automatically unleash their cries for money.
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I remember having that trouble on my first visit to Asia, 25 years ago. I studied Thai, Vietnamese and Korean and politely tell them some other time. For the one timers who go for a few months. I recommend telling them “yes” enthusiastically and then just keep walking.
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Sabina Reply:
April 10th, 2011 at 00:33
They were doing this 25 years ago!? They will never stop. Maybe I should have learned to say no in the local languages. But I don’t think that would have helped.
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Those are cyclo drivers in the pictures. Tuk tuks are in Thailand and Sri Lanka. Tuk tuk loosely translates to anytime anywhere. Chok Dee.
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Sabina Reply:
April 10th, 2011 at 00:34
I didn’t know these people are called cyclo drivers and I didn’t know the meaning of tuk tuk. Thanks a lot!
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I swear…. if another tuk tuk driver pulls up infront of me, when I’m trying to cross the road, saying “Where you go”?… bad things are gonna happen…
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totally agree with your comment – let me come to you. It’s horrible the way they harass you, understand they want to make money, but they have the wrong approach. It’s intimidating and you just feel like they are going to try to overcharge you, they’re so over eager.
In Vietnam I brought stuff from a girl in a shop, who was quite shy! She let me come into her shop, and just look in peace, she wasn’t all over me like a bad rash. I really appreciated it!
In Hanoi this weekend, came out of a museum to look for a taxi and there were about 6 drivers all trying to ‘get me’. I tried asked if they knew where the place I wanted to go was, if they had a meter and if it was one that wasn’t fixed to go fast.
In the end, a Aussie family asked if I wanted to share – they had a taxi lined up where the meter couldn’t be tampered with.
Was nice to beat them at their own game.
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Sabina Reply:
June 24th, 2011 at 05:59
Hi, Rebecca – You definitely know what it’s like. I found the hasseling to just be so incredibly annoying. They just don’t realize they might actually get more business if they stop trying so hard. It’s good that the Aussie family gave you a lift. At least that was one time you were able to escape.
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I wrote something similar like this. Even though I tried to be patient and stay positive, I really was exhausted just in three days. I know it’s their way of make a living, but… it’s really hard to tell.
http://runawayjuno.com/2010/09/28/how-to-deal-with-cambodia-siem-reap/
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Sabina Reply:
November 21st, 2011 at 15:22
I just read your post, Juno. I really enjoyed it and sympathize totally. It’s so hard to walk off from all the suffering children. The best thing we can do is pray for them.
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